Kristopher Dean

Kristopher Dean

Kristopher Dean, a participant in the Dadaab Theater Project, shares his thoughts.
I HAVE SPENT A WEEK LOOKING FOR WORDS

I just don’t know how to feel about what I experienced in Kenya with the Dadaab

theater project. I am only left with questions:

Was I a positive participant in this event?

How do I put what I experienced into my art, my life?

What should I do know?

Why am I angry?

Why do I feel guilty?

A former teacher of mine told me once that you will always say “I wish I had done

more, worked harder, started sooner.” But that is all that I can think of to say when

it comes to the experience to sharing 5 days with 8 refugees.

I want to say my heart breaks for them, but I don’t think pity will do anything.

I wish that I could give each of them the education they yearn for.

I just don’t know what to do or how to feel.

What happened between all of us? How can I take the experience and grow it up into

the future?

The Americans made a show called ‘The Collapsible Space Between Us,’ and together

the Americans and the Refugees from Somalia, Sudan, and Ethiopia created a show

that to my knowledge was untitled. And now, it seems there is a final act waiting,

and fortunately I have so many questions to guide me toward it’s manifestation.

And I know, with my fist clenched that I am strong.